So I started watching “The Carries Diaries” and must I say I
am totally in love with it. I read the book by the same name last year and I
loved it as well. Just that, I can relate to it now. Or shall I say I can
completely relate to it now- big city, managing new and old relationships,
internships and the most difficult- finding yourself and creating your
identity! And in the whole process- I seemed to have lost “the real me”, if
that makes any sense. Just till about 8 months back, i.e. when I stepped into
this big city- Pune, I used to find the above said to be like a really cool and
fun, as in like some adventure trip where you get to find the purpose of your
existence, which by the way is true to quite an extent with the only difference
that instead of cool, it is very complicated. And this “complicated” part
overpowers the “fun” part so much that after a little while, the “fun” part
seems to disappear completely.
It is hard to believe how everything has changed for me in the
past 8 months, except for the fact, that I still am the same “day dreamer” as I
have been all my life. That, I doubt, will ever change! But at the same time I
feel I am still the same Puneet. Remember “COMPLICATED”? It is difficult to
understand why these entire dilemmas occur? We can either be negative about
finding its answer or positive. Either ways, the situation won’t change. So why
not take it in a positive way and accept all these transitions and be happy. I know
it is NOT easy. There have been so many times I have broke down completely just
because either I am not able to understand myself or (like always) no one
understands me or worse still, no one even makes an attempt to understand
me. That’s sad, But I have a positive
answer for that too- No one else gets to know me “the REAL me” and so I have
all the privilege of knowing myself. Does that even make any sense?
I have always believed, still believe and will continue to
believe that “Everything happens for a reason”. Ring any bells? Yes, I have
already written about the same phrase. I keep going back to my favorite things.
Or should I say I keep improving on them with each passing day. But it gets
very hard at times. There comes a time when I lose it completely and I don’t know
what to do? My life’s current scenario, juggled up in everything. But I’m sure
it’s just a phase and will pass in no time. Fingers cross!!
